Hi, I’m Niki. board certified clinical sexologist and intimacy coach
A little bit more personal
Helping individuals and partners navigate relationship, body and intimacy challenges and desires is a real gift. I come to this work with not only years of study, continued education, and true passion for the job, I come to it with lived experience going through challenges that a lot of other people face. Mismatched libidos and sexless marriages aren’t just common, they are one of the most prominent concerns we work with in this field, and my partner and I went through it for a lot of years. I know my experiences and being open about them will be beneficial to others, and I hope that knowing I’ve been through it and am out the other side will be encouraging to those who wish for the same thing.
As someone who experiences intense chronic pain and has since 2001, alongside chronic illnesses and gradually changing dynamic invisible disabilities, I am also well-positioned to help clients like myself who might have different access needs to pleasure and sex. Finding pleasure and power in disabled and chronically ill bodies is bold and goes against what we are often taught. I’d like to help you reclaim your body, your pleasure, and your voice, no matter your gender, sexuality, relationship dynamics, background, age or abilities. I made all of these big changes in my 40’s and I’d like to support you while you make yours in whatever stage of life you’re in. While taking the first steps to change your relationship to yourself or others is not always simple or easy, it can be remarkably rewarding, life-changing, and absolutely filled with pleasure.
My Approach
AS a sexologist
As a board certified Clinical Sexologist, I share pleasure-forward, evidence-based sex education to help my clients experience more pleasure in their lives, presence in their bodies, and attunement to their own unique needs and desires.
Our relationship to our bodies is ever changing, things like chronic pain, illness, disability, pregnancy, mental health, aging and so much more can affect how we feel about and see ourselves. Learning to rediscover our body and it’s erotic potential throughout these changes is a courageous and rewarding undertaking, and I hope to make the process uplifting, affirming, and nonjudgemental, while always being rooted in consent and trauma-informed care.
I guide my clients to explore with gentle curiosity what their body is saying, what it is holding on to, and what it is ready to let go of.
I am certified with the American Board of Sexology, and as an SCU graduate an organizational member of the World Association of Sexual Health.
While supervision and continued education is not mandatory for sexologists and coaches as it is for therapists, I am part of an organization that is committed to those things within this profession, to maintain accountability and growth as I continue in this work. Check out the Association of Somatic and Integrative Sexologists. Check out ASIS for more information.
as a coach
As a Certified Sex Coach, I help my clients pinpoint their sexual concerns or interests, develop their desires or goals, and work with them to co-create a personalized action plan to live more authentically within them. Some people want to achieve specific goals, while others crave a soft way to explore their bodies and feelings around sex in an unhurried, shame-free atmosphere. Coaching with me is often goal-oriented, while always consent-driven and trauma-informed. Boundaries and speaking up for yourself are both encouraged and celebrated!
It is important to know that coaching is not therapy. In therapy you might dive deep into your past, work on revealing or healing trauma or repairing relationships, or identify why certain feelings and experiences impact you the way they do. A therapist or psychologist may diagnose or treat a clinical disorder, and a coach cannot.
In sex coaching, we can help somatically, using the wisdom of your body in tandem with sex education, to close the gap from where you are now to where you want to be, sexually or relationally. Our sessions are designed together and unique to you, and may include mindfulness, somatic practices, skill-building exercises, role-playing initiation or disclosure scenarios, and so much more. I have additional experience and education working with folks who are chronically ill, disabled, and experience chronic pain, and we will often work on ways to connect to our bodies after dissociating from pain, staying present in intimacy, and stating our particular access needs without shame or fear.
We get to talk about the fun stuff too, like exploring toys, techniques, positions, novel experiences and all the rest! Our work is collaborative, and tailored to you and what you will do after you leave your session. Expect to do some work, and know that I’m here to support you through the complexities of learning and growing into who and what you want to be.
I work with clients of all genders, sexual orientations, abilities and relationship structures. I am so happy to support you.